Seven Deadly Sins.....Sloth

It is Terrible Tuesday again and I have another Seven Deadly Sin post to contribute to the carnival. I chose Gluttony last week and this week I am doing Sloth. I decided to participate in this carnival because it just sounded cool, but I have found in writing these posts that it is actually quite cathartic. I spent a year in Catholic prison (that is a Catholic high school) which I chose of my own accord because I wanted to learn something. I have to admit I learned a lot, but I also closed off to a lot, like some of the lessons in the Seven Deadly Sins. A sin for a Catholic (for the type of Catholic I was-don't want to offend anyone) is something to confess to your priest and then move on, I never looked at how these “sins” could impact personal growth, who knew I would get that lesson from a blog!!



Sloth is defined as spiritual and/or actual apathy or laziness. Sloth can also concern wasting due to lack of use or allowing entropy, expanding into almost any person, place, thing, skills, or intangible ideal that would require maintenance, refinement and/or support to continue to exist.

Sloth is a tricky one, because most people have a tendency to, at some point, want to slack off or shirk responsibilities. So when is a propensity to doing something actually considered a regularity or an overriding character flaw?


When I think of sloth I think of some slacker, with bad hygiene, living in a dump that spends their life just squeaking by. A slothful person is lazy, has no goals, no drive, no positive momentum, and really doesn’t contribute much to the whole scheme of things. But is it really that cut and dry?


Over the last 5 to 6 years work has gotten the majority of my attention, it has taken everything in me to remember that family, friends, and life outside of work is important. If there is apathy towards any portion of my life it is in my personal life, but that is perfectly acceptable right? Because I am a “successful” contributing member of society! I am single answerable to no one. I am a model to look up to in my work ethic and industry knowledge. I have a good portion of the material things that you are supposed to want to have, so I can’t possibly be slothful.


According to Tyler Durden (The beautiful chaos creator in Fight Club) “F*#k off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let... lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may.”


I tend to put all my efforts into one direction, while neglecting everything else. Entropy, a lack of pattern or organization, a tendency for all matter and energy in the universe to evolve toward a state of inert uniformity -this definition would contradict my model life and actually prove that I am very slothful. In almost every area of my life outside of work I am stagnant; I have pushed life to tomorrow or the day after. I neglect myself, my family, and friends so I can fulfill some crazy dream to be the best most successful girl on the planet.


So now another Tyler Durden quote, “a question of etiquette - as I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?” Ha ha…that one just makes me laugh the quote I really wanted to use is, “You have to know the answer to this question! If you died right now, how would you feel about your life?”


This is a question that I started asking myself after a kidney stone in 2006, after the mortgage meltdown in 2007, and have continued to ask myself over the last 5 months, I am a slow to act sometimes. This is a little scary because I can look back at major turning points, good and bad, in my life and they all started with that question. Even the road that lead me to my current situation was predicated by that query. So 5 months ago I looked at what we have now established as a very slothful existence, and decided I needed to make a change. If I died tomorrow I would feel that I had squandered, wasted, and misspent a good portion of the last 6 years (yes I know that all those words mean the same thing - I just thought I needed to say it three times).


I have made some major changes over the last 2 years / 3 months and I continue to push forward in my new less slothful life. It is truly hard though. It is so tantalizing to want to revert back to, an easy, work driven, uncomplicated, yet stressful existence. Life is messy, the more interaction you have with family, friends, and new people tends to bring overwhelming chaos to a rather dull but comfortable existence. I also hate cleaning my house so I need to make enough money to pay someone else to do it or I will still be slothful because my house won’t be clean. See the issues here….but I am striving to be more balanced and to be present in the lives of those around me.


Some of the changes:


I am strategically moving away from a job that I just exist in to a job I love


Taking time throughout the year to do things for myself and with my family and friends


Finding my purpose and passion and incorporating it in all that I do.


I can understand why sloth would be considered a sin, because it just seems like a travesty to squander life, and yet so easy to do. So check back in a year and let’s see if I have let the sloth monster gobble me back up or if I have continued on my “enlightened” path.



Don't forget to check out the other carnival members:



Huckdoll

Caffeine Court

Secrets of a Black Heart

CableGirl